First Dose of Moderna on 03/05/21 Lot #036AZIA
Second Dose of Moderna on 04/02/21 Lot #027B21A
Colorado
41 yrs old
April 6, 2022 FDA Open Hearing:
Original interview published on 03/01/2022:
Q: What was your life like before you got the vaccine?
I am a massage therapist of 22 years who shut down my thriving business during covid 2020 to keep myself, my clients, my household, and my community safe. 2020 was a struggle for me financially and emotionally. It was a great opportunity for personal growth! But it was a challenge to say the least. I love to work a lot and love what I do. I was used to being independent, but I didn't feel working with people that closely during a pandemic was safe for anyone. I was chomping at the bit to get back and see my beloved clients again! Ready to connect and make a difference like before. I was healthy, enthused, inspired, the vaccine was my miracle!
Q: Would you like to share your reasons for getting vaccinated?
I believed it was the right thing to do for myself, household, my clients and my fellow citizens and the world. I had never had a vaccine reaction, so I was not afraid at all. I was told it was totally safe, and I believed the experts I spoke with. I couldn't wait to get back to my vibrant work and social life and to make a real income again, not to mention be able to travel and see my family! I fully expected the vaccine was my key to freedom and would do nothing but save lives.
Q: What was your reaction, symptoms, & timeline?
Got my 2nd shot of Moderna a month after the 1st shot. Had a bit of a headache from the 1st shot, but nothing major. I got the 2nd shot right on the scheduled time, 9:45am, April 2nd, 2021. I immediately felt something in my system. There may have been a taste? But I definitely felt it coursing through my bloodstream, thought that was weird, so after, I waited in my car another 30 min or so to be sure I was ok. By 12:30p, I felt the flu reaction begin. By 8p, I was experiencing fever, terrible chills and head to toe body aches. 3 days later much of that subsided, and I felt extreme fatigue and brain fog. It has been a rollercoaster of ever evolving symptoms such as: Extreme fatigue, almost paralysis some days, brain fog, inability to regulate temp, intolerance to heat and cold, dizziness/ vertigo, insomnia, tingling and numbness in extremities, flare up of pain in hip and low back, heart pain, palpitations from any level of exertion, darting vision, double vision, inability to focus and concentrate, dehydration, food sensitivities that didn't exist before, muscles spasms, intense itching that can show up anywhere in the body, comes from nowhere, difficulty managing emotions like never before, pain in liver and spleen, loss of appetite, pain after eating anything at all, tachycardia, sensitivity to light and sound, feeling sick all of the time, difficulty reading, comprehending, texting, remembering, constant but fluctuating internal, intense internal shaking, inability to sit or stand some days. Other days, inability to calm nerves, weird fits of joyless laughter, system revved up, extreme neck tension that comes from nowhere and just goes away, vertigo, can't lie on either side, so always have to be in my back, loss of appetite, adversely also ravenous bottomless pit at times, blood sugar issues, constant malaise, inability to exercise since it induces even more malaise vertigo palpitations, can't have conversations with friends or read, can't even watch things for too long. Everything takes energy I either don't have or it triggers the nervous system to rev up, and then I have to do hours of breathing to calm down. Believe it or not, there's more I'm sure I'm forgetting! But I'm exhausted just typing this all out, so done for now.
Q: What is your life like now, after getting the vaccine?
Symptoms are ever evolving. Most days, I can't drive, have to limit conversations, screen time, cooking, showering, chores, even texting and emailing are a lot. If I'm not totally fatigued, then it's the opposite. I have to do tons of breathing and make myself be still to help my nervous system not fry itself. It feels like I am a child with ADHD, and someone force fed me a pot of coffee, and told me to sit still. I am pretty much confined to my bedroom most days. I can't work, because I never know what symptoms the day will bring and when and to what intensity. I can't read much, I can't watch for long, I can't go for walks. Zoom is very overwhelming to the nervous system, so just phone calls when I can manage. It's isolating. Docs have no answers, so people don't know what to think. I do a ton of emotional work, so that has saved my life quite literally. I do sound therapy, breathing exercises, and I try to get things done a little at a time. It's taken me almost 2 months to write this to you all. Debilitated is a good word to describe it, but I continue to stay focused on getting better and on what I can control.
Q: Share your experience with any medical care and any diagnoses you have received:
No diagnosis of any kind. I have seen multiple GP doctors, infectious disease specialist, a DO, a supposed post covid specialist, and next week I finally get into neurologist. I have had CT scans of the head, chest, and abdomen. I do work with a practitioner (Biologist/Herbalist/Nutritionist/ EFT practitioner, etc.) who cannot diagnose, but she believes, and I do too, that this is one hell of an Epstein Barr reactivation. I never was diagnosed with mono, but my brother was when we were kids. Docs just keep throwing tests at me that I pass with flying colors. She actually gives me supplement and diet and emotional work recommendations as my symptoms evolve. I believe they're keeping me from getting even worse. I did a whole Epstein-Barr protocol this fall that I got second hand from a functional medicine doctor. I can't afford an FMD or naturopath, but I've gotten good info from patients that are friends. There are lots of treatments recommended by FMDs, but I can't afford those either.
Some supplements I believe have helped for a time:
NAC
Lysine
Vitamin D
Licorice
Cat's claw
Monolaurin
Biocidin
Vitamin C
Lion's mane
Omegagenics neuro fish oil
Lemon balm
B 12
Selenium
Zinc
I've noticed my body tells me when it's done with a certain supplement. I'll suddenly be repulsed by it and unable to choke it down. One of my practitioners, believes I have moved through the EBV reactivation, and now I'm experiencing a damaged nervous system that needs to heal. It makes sense, and it's all I've got, so we just continue to take away and add things as symptoms evolve.
Q: Was your reaction reported, and what was the response?
I did the VAERS route. They sent the survey each Friday for 5 or 6 weeks or a month, maybe? Can't recall. But as we know, those surveys are a joke. Someone called me in July and took my statement. I got a few more surveys from them but nothing else. I applied for the CICP vaccine injury deal in June, when I got worse. I checked back in a few months later, they claimed I was missing a copy of my vax card, so I sent it in. Checked back in in the fall, guy said not to hold my breath, because they had lots to sift through. I don't expect to ever see a dime, as I've been learning about this system that doesn't pay out.
Q: Have your symptoms improved?
Symptoms are ever evolving, but the extremes seem to be evening out. The best thing I am doing is the inner work with the program I train inside of. Being able to manage the emotions, even as the body gives the cues for anxiety, panic attacks, and more, has been a literal life saver.
Q: Have you had Covid before? What was your experience if so?
I have not had covid.
Q: What do you wish others knew?
First, I wish there was help for those of us that have been injured. I am pro-vax, and I would have gotten this vaccine, even if I was made aware of the risks. Most of us do not think we will be the one in a million! But having this happen and being treated by doctors like I might be imagining it, them not taking it seriously at all because they do not have the data, not to mention having no way to work and no financial help, it has been beyond challenging. I also wish people had access to emotional intelligence training. I wish everyone had the tools to manage their emotional worlds, not just the injured, but the medical professionals we rely on, the politicians we rely on. If we could all manage ourselves better, I know we would not have all these issues. It's crazy making appointments with docs knowing nothing at all and weirded out by vaccine injury talk, all the conspiracy theories and political stuff involved. No financial assistance, no idea of when I'll be better. Without the inner work I do, I surely would have chosen to get off the planet. Instead, I'm focusing mostly on getting better and knowing joy and freedom and connection no matter what the body is doing. I am not claiming this is a cure, but this is the best medicine, I am convinced!
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